preserving the moment

twas half past to midnight.. still early for those boys to stay awake and alive.. but, being the only decision maker at home when aboh is not around, i switched  off the TV and went in the room.. after loud screams, yells and cries, the adik decided to surrender and joined me.. abang, as always, did not complaint much.. i guess, after three hours of switching back and forth the playhouse disney, nickelodeon, disney channel and cartoon network, he opted to stay silent when mama decided to veto the remote.

there, five minutes then, three of us were on the bed.. in the dark.. and aimar broke the silence "gatal"... last month, before aboh went off for work, aimar still said "ka".. which means gatal/itch.. and means he need adult supervision to scratch him.. my boys (and i guess all kids out there) tend to 'create' their own language before they decided to use what we, adults, use. i still remember when my cousin called me all the way from kl central because aidan was crying and wanted some "wak".. that's chocolate for him..and of course when aimar called himself "ma" he meant aimar and "mama" is me!..  in times, they fit in, using the words adults could understand.. and the "bebe" aidan used to call now clearly become slipper..

back to our "lying on the bed" scene, i asked the boys if they would be happy to have a younger brother / sister.. aidan said yes immediately.. of course he has been brainwashed that mama wants a younger sister, and so does he.. aimar - without doubt - said "no"... trying to convince him hard by telling everybody wants new addition in the family.. he insisted in saying "no"...

how i wish my dear hubby is there, lying next to us.. i was smiling away with aimar's reaction.. he is so determined to be the only adik in the family.. and he is only two! yes, when aboh come home, we will definitely prompt the question back to him.. just like i did this morning.. and he will still say "no".. but the moment i had last night, with the boys, talking about how nice to have a new baby, how cool life would be, bla bla bla..and today, when i woke up in the morning, and as i'm writing this, i still wish my hubby was with us last night.. poor him.. all out there, by himslef, working his ass off and missing the moment... of course, there's more moment to come.. still...

and these smart boys of mine.. they will grow up and grow out.. they will stop sleeping on the same bed as me..and how i wish i could freeze time...