aimar demam

when i was pregnant with aimar, i was worried that i couldn't cope with aidan. he was only a year and three month old. 

but he was an easy boy. he was kind to me. the instance i told him that i have to stop breastfeeding him, there were no arguments and dramas like other kids would throw. everything went well, he didn't complaint with bottlefed, and i didn't remember i have to 'fight' over my breast with him.. of course, my husband were offshore half of the time, and i was in kemaman back then. but, thank to my MIL as she was there, and somehow, as i'm writing this, i missed her masak singgang... it was a simple dish, but no one could have done it best than her.. hmm.. i must insist on her cooking that dish for me any time sooner! my sickness was not any good, but aidan was great, and never gets on my nerve.

now, as i'm pregnant, again, i have two boys of my own. to-date, i've been literally 'abandoning' them. i was lucky enough to have my mum, dad, aunts, cousins, sister and all others to help to me to take care of them... to be exact, to take care of us. i stopped the laundry, the ironing.. the everything. the sickness is unbearable, and i just wished i could get back on my feet as soon as possible...

as i woke up in the middle of the night, i was all alone.. neither aidan nor aimar nor both of them were next to me. it has been like that for the past  few nights.. the boys normally sleep with me, on the same bed, but lately, them moving left and right trying to dozed off did not help much with my headaches.. always end up i would be increasing my volume, and voluntarily they would go to gramps's room and sleep... and this morning, as i woke up, i went to give aimar a peck, and felt sudden heat on his cheek.. gosh, he's down with fever, and where was i through out the night? kesian my dear kiddo! i felt so guilty!!!!!!!