Thursday, February 20, 2014

the side effects

ada 2mins before my 11th session of radiotheraphy..
felt like posting things
i was told the side effects will only come on week three or four after rt. mine came earlier.. the 2nd week, the hair was falling everywhere.. nope, am not balding, but the hair is thinning. one of the radiotherapist thought i had a short haircut, but i didn't.

my tastebuds has gone completely. i remembered being sick or pregnant and refused to eat because i couldn't taste the food. this is totally different. when i said i didn't taste anything, i literally means it!! all food taste like paper.... i'm chewing things in my mouth, but i could hardly tell if its good or not, sweet sour or bitter.. nada!! its tasteless, for real. but am forcing myself to eat. i just have to. i can't afford to lose any weight. i need the energy for the next 22 treatments!! i took ensure milk as supplement.. but i still has to eat!!

i lost 1kg in 2 wks. it's still ok. the mask i wore for the rt has loosen up.. more reason to eat!

both my hands and feets were significantly darkened. the skin started peeling and it hurts. i trued applying the cream.. dont help much tho.

been gargling soda bicarbonat n salt water. it helps. my saliva has thickened. my throat in pain.
am not complaining yet. been praying hard these will get over one day, sooner;(
the side effects were no fun
but at least, i knew the treatment works as it should
the lumps are getting smaller
hoping the cancer cells are gone by the 33rd rt.
the chemo are lesser pain though am doing it weekly.
its either am getting used to it or the smaller dosage really helps.
i want to heal. hanya Allah maha kuasa penentu segala

Friday, February 7, 2014

the treatment

completed 3 cycles of chemo.. it wasn't fun.. one day i was fine the next day i was vomitting like mad.. my fingers, hands n feet were darken.. it's the effect and will go away, insyaallah..

my chemo started on 2nd dec.. with the cisplatin on the first day n 6x500mg xeloda daily for 14 days n rest for 7 days n continue for the next cycle right after.. my 2nd cycle was horrible, so doc reduced the xeloda intake on the 3rd cycle. alhamdullillah.. it wasn't as bad as the 2nd cycle.

started my radiotheraphy on wednesday. i was supposed to do my cisplatin chemo on that day. but my white blood cell was at 0.9 while the min requirement was 1.5.. so, doc decided not to start with the chemo. i was on booster for 2 days and voila, my wbc was at 11 today ;) yeeaayy, i can proceed on my weekly chemo for the next 7 wks..not that i'm into chemo, but, i reaaly want to make sure the program i was scheduled to is completed as planned.. yang lain2, tawakkal n doa.

so far, the radio still went well.. the effect will only come after my 10th treatments onward.. praying hard it wont give me horrible side effects.. tho it is expected. en ashraf dah cukup risau.. especially when he needs to be offshore time ni.. of course i wanted hin to be around.. tapi, takpe bang.. u were away pun sebab nak provide for the family- restu, doa, solat hajat abg utk mje will teman me until u come back onshore..

my diet has to change.. i'm took manuka honey every morning and ensure milk twice a day. tadi doc ckp my red blood cell pulak menurun sebab my bone marrow still recovering from the chemo previously.. all thus while at 10, hari ni at 8.9.. border line of 8.. so, balik ni kene stuff myself in withe kerang, red meats n greens... hmmmnmn

boring lak citer pasal treatment.. pasni nak citer pasal anak3 n hubby lak..

ni nak baring jap, ubat chemo tgh masuk;(